Year end entry
got wasted on Dec 30, 2008; 11:02 PM
January:
Thesis. Productions. Finals. The January pervert. Cried a few times, regretted a lot of things. Lost my phone. Lost myself. Fucked up month. Needed time for myself. Decided to go on Hiatus, to get rid of people I don't need in my life.
- Learn how to play the game of trust, know who deserves it, never mind those who don't
- Never be afraid of losing people who don’t deserve your time and attention, take the courage to let go and throw them out of your lives
- “It’s when problems are shared that solutions are found” – From Chowking’s fortune cookie 01-18-08
- “In the end you will always go back to the people that were there in the beginning.” – text quote from Jenny (That’s why I never take my friends for granted... mawala na lahat wag lang pamilya ko at sila.)
- “Sometimes it’s not love, sometimes, you’ve just become so attached that you’ve developed a need for that person... Just a need, not love... but you’re too scared to admit it, even to yourself...because you know that if you do, you might lose the only person that actually gives a damn about your life” – text quote from Heyna
- Learn to accept and love yourself, walang ibang gagawa niyan kundi ikaw... hindi kailangang nakadepende palagi sa iba ang pagiging masaya.
February:
Hiatus lasted until 11th of February. Started with a blast. Good vibes. Firsts. The longest yet shortest walk . One time big time. Three years ago we were strangers, snap! then we became friends. Finding myself. Brought back the old me. Valentine's darlings for the day with the Singles. A month of finding oneself, month of happiness and dreams turning in to reality.
- Don't stop dreaming, never stop hoping, dreams come true... kahit one time big time.
March:
A month of closing chapters and opening new ones. Graduation. Inumans as usual. Few heart to heart talks with friends.
- Treasure the friends you have, always be there for them
- Learn to accept changes in your life. Let go move on and be happy
April:
Early summer getaway. Bad news. "The world spins constantly, so does the color wheel". Sad month. Month of pain, regrets and wishes. pressure cooker 1 2 3 kaboom! Hello panget kamay!
- The world spins constantly, so does the color wheel – ana
- “Kahit ikaw ay parang bato manhid at walang pakiramdam, mag-ingat ka dahil kahit ganyan ka, hindi nasasaktan... kaya mo namang makasakit” – Bob Ong
- NEVER BUKSAN ANG PRESSURE COOKER HABANG KUMUKULO
May:
Turned 21. Dead Stars. Deleted my old blog, trying to move on I guess. Deleted the entries but still saved a few. Moved to blogspot. Promised to write happier entries.
- “You’re gonna have your good days and your bad days”- South of Nowhere
- “So all these years-since when? - he had been seeing the light of dead stars , long extinguished, yet seemingly still in their appointed places in the heavens.”-Dead Stars
- Know when enough is enough.
June:
I was badly missing college life. A friend died. Had a sudden change of heart. Put half of my walls down. Still confused and hesitant though. Fears. Had my first ever exam and interview. Screwed up. Got reunited with my grade school and high school friends.June was a month of gambling,a month of courage.
- Don't try to push people out of your life, no one deserves to be taken for granted
- Even if you have new people/friends in your life, never forget those who were part of your past, for you will never complete your life’s puzzle if you lose some of its pieces.
July:
Indie month. Mommy and Daddy had to go to Cebu. Responsibilities. Growing up. Maturity. Hated the rain for reminding me of things/people I was trying to forget. Misunderstandings. Tried to give it another shot. Second chances.
- Never assume
- Learn how to take responsibilities
- Always be mindful of the things you do and the words you say
August:
Driving lessons. Ate was back from Dubai. Eheads reunion concert. Finally decided to get rid of the old dust to let the new ones in.
- No two things can occupy the same space at the same time – law of impenetrability
- Letting go might be hard yet it is the best way to let another stay
September:
Chill month. Inumans
- Find some time to chill, find and reconnect with the things or people you've grown apart from
- Drink.Get drunk.Laugh.have fun... then die haha
October:
A month of firsts. Major changes. Leaving comfort zones. Facing fears. Got hired. First work ever. Lots of inumans. Ate was back from Dubai again. Had my very first paycheck ever. Hello poverty. Finally decided to take my chances, cross the street, take the risks, throw myself in to the lions den.
- “I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with FEAR. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying.”---Greys Anatomy
- “BOUNDARIES don’t keep other people out, they fence you in. So you can waste your life drawing lines? Or you can live your life crossing them. Because here’s what I know, if you are willing to take the chance the view from the other side is Spectacular.”---Greys Anatomy
November
Reunion. Wanted to quit my job. "Nagsisimula ka palang quitter ka na" - Mommy
- Patience is a virtue ahaha!
December
December 5 was my last day of being a copywriter. I sure am gonna miss them. Had a burgis Christmas party. Applied again and got hired. Got my license. Family reunions. Back to Bulacan. And just recently found out I've been lied to thank you very much.
- Again Patience is a Virtue
- AGAIN learn how to play the game of trust
- Learn to hate pride
All in all my 2008 was full of Ups and Downs, Yeheys and boo-hoos. But at least I managed to see the lessons in those downs and boo-hoo moments and even in the ups and yeheys hahaha.
This year I’ve gained lots of new friends, and unfortunately lost some.
I’ve made decisions, and regretted some.
But all is done.
I wouldn’t want to waste my short life looking back, feeling bad and regretting things.
and so i quote.....my 18 year old self ahahahahhaha
...always remember to look on the brighter side of life, appreciate every moment, every little thing around us, enjoy each and every moment in life, even the fucked up ones... because in this journey, you can only go forward... there’s no turning back..
Yehey thank you 2008!
I'm ready to let you go.
Good bye!
I'll miss you. I'll miss the old me... young, careless, and stupid.
Hello 2009! I'm ready.. C'mon let's get it on!
Labels: 2008, ako, alcohol, babae, bliss, career, driving, eraserheads, family, friendship, hate, life, love, nostalgia, past, present, quote, regrets, tala, welcome
Nostalgia
got wasted on Aug 15, 2008; 9:59 AM
When I checked my phone this morning, there was a message from Ate O. I opened it and read it, and this was what was in her text message:
Alam mu ba aug 17 na ko uuwi? Ipinakiusap ako nung isang leader sa mataas na pinuno. Naiyak ako hahaha. blahblahblah then details ng pagdating niya
For those who are naiintriga, my sister left for dubai to work for an airline company few months ago, mga November I think. Saming magkakapatid siguro siya yung pinakaka-close ko because we're both maarte, loud, maldita, maloko, lasengga, laitera, lakwatsera,ukay ukayeras atbp. (haha parang puro nega yun ah). Anyway, since she left mejo tumahimik dito sa bahay dahil nabawas ang kaingayan niya, plus dagdag mo pa na yung other sister kong si Ate Monette ay may work na, si Abie nagsschool na, and Daddy's already in Cebu. Tahimik na talaga yung bahay.
I'm very VERY very VERY excited sa pag uwi ni Ate O. kasi uuwi din si Daddy.. November pa kami huling nakumpleto. Pero alam ko mas excited sila, lalo na si Ate O. Actually dapat bukas na ang uwi niya, after ng shift niya uwi na siya dito kaya lang hindi daw na-approve yung replacement thingamajigs so na-move ng 18. At kagabi nga lang e na-move na ng 17.
Kung titingnan mo, ilang days lang naman yung difference pero big deal sa kanya yung ilang days na yun.. Kung pwedeng pinaka pinaka pinaka ASAP e AASAPAN niya na talaga.
Yun ang mahirap talaga when you're working miles away from home matatalo ka talaga ng homesickness. Though you get to talk to your family through text, e-mails, and IM's iba pa din yung sabay kayong shumashopping, sabay kumakain, sabay nalalasing haha! I can't say na I had the total experience na ma-homesick. Konti lang yung compared sa kanya. Anyway, last summer 2007 I had to stay at my friend's house for like a month or two ata because of my OJT. I was excited at first kasi nagniningning sa isip ko yung "ALAK EVERY NIGHT, MADALING ARAW NA UWI GALING SA INUMAN, LAKWATSA atbp" Nung una nag eenjoy ako talaga, kaya lang kasi birthday ko nung isang araw tapos na-sad ako kasi di ako nagcelebrate with my family, nagcelebrate ako nung weekend before nung birthday ko. Tapos nung night nung birthday ko, tatlo lang kami nung friends kong umiinom, monthsary din nila yun so double celebration. Tapos nag away pa sila hahaha! Happy birthday talaga, so we ended up sleeping nalang kalahati lang ata yung nabawas dun sa alak. After nun namiss ko na ang bahay namin... at sabi nga sa isang Eheads song "mahal kita pero miss na miss ko na ang aking kama.. at ang malupit kong unan.." Kaya sabi ko, uuwi na ko. Kaya ayun umuwi nga ako nagpasundo ako sa ABS-CBN sa aking mga magulang at sinama nila ko sa Tagaytay uminom kami ng walang humpay lasing kaming dalawa ni Daddy ahahah!
Ay andami kong segue anu ba yan...
Ang point ko lang naman..
UNA: Mahirap talagang malayo ka sa family mo, kahit sabihin mo pang limpak limpak na salapi ang sinusweldo mo.. kahit sabihin mo pang pwede kang lumangoy sa alak gabi gabi ang all. Dadating at dadating talaga yung time na mahohomesick ka
PANGALAWA: Excited na ko sa pag uwi ni Daddy, at lalo na ni Ate O. na mga pinaka-close ko sa bahay na ito.. akalain mo noh sila na nga yung mga pinakanakakasundo ko nagsi-alisan pa.. Excited na ko talaga hindi dahil sa mga pasalubong na dala nila..(pero sige na kasama na'rin yun..ps3 come to Ana!) Excited ako kasi macocomplete na kami ulit... ay hindi padin pala dahil wala na si Ash.. so sad.. ahaha labo ko
PANGATLO: Ang bilis ng panahon, kahapon nagmuni muni kasi ako.. naalala ko yung sarili ko yearsssss before.. isang summer day, nakahiga ako sa sofa namin sa may bintana..ginagawa ang favorite kong gawain tumanga.. sabi ko sa sarili ko anu kayang buhay ko after ko mag aral, anu kayang ichura ko pag dalaga na ko.. mga ganun ganun.. tapos naisip ko andito na ko sa stage na dati tinatanga tanga at sinisilip silip ko lang sa bintana noon... tapos dating dati pa naalala ko nag ffiesta carnival pa kami. hahah tapos pag nagbabakasyon sila sa QC ng one week at iwan ako dito sa Antipolo mabuang buang na ko sa pagkabored at pagkamiss sa kanila.. tapos ngayon ang usapan na Dubai..Cebu.. Antipolo.. haha pero teka parang di na ko nakamove on ah ako padin yung iwan sa Antipolo???? ahahaha
PANG-APAT: UUWI NA NGA SILA!!!!!!!! UUWI NA UUWI NA UUWI NA!! sobrang saya ko lang bow.. sana safe ang maging biyahe nila.. NAIA hintayin mo ko magkikita nanaman tayo! :)
wiii!!! KO, ate O. and me @ a secret jolog bar with jolog people where I got really drunk and tripped off the stage ahahah sa ngalan ng Chicosci!
ate O. cha and me @ Miriam ANO?! concert.. isaw galore, again nakainom pero di lasing :)
gate crashing the MCfreshmen's night hahaha
at the Our Lady of Manaoag church ate monette, abie, ate oyang , mommy
i don't have pictures of daddy and kuya dito na bago eh ahahah yan nalang sobrang luma payatot pa si daddy hahah ngaun parang jimmy santos na...wala kaming family picture na complete eh..pero promise pagdating nila meron na :)
how vintage.. that's kuya, ate o. and me.. watching shake rattle and roll ahahha
Labels: family, letrato, nostalgia
